7 months of Lucille Amelia (and 4/52)

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“a portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014″

She’s seven months old. And I’m sitting here with a heavy heart. I have days like this. Days where I feel overwhelmed with the uncertainty and the sheer terror of life. Days when I think about my lost sister, about my friends, about people who are facing far more than they ever should. But as I drove home from campus tonight, I also thought about what I’d tell my daughter when she was seven, when she was seventeen, when she was twenty-seven and driving home, feeling scared of life’s unpredictable twists and turns.

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And I realized I’d tell her this: death and terror never have the final word. Although it may seem like darkness surrounds, there is a present and unfading light to be found in this world. We find it in faith…in family…in friends. And when those terror-filled times come, we’ll find it even amidst the confusion and fear.

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Lucy, you truly have been a bringer of light. After a season of darkness, your presence has filled our family with laughter. You’re seven months old and you couldn’t be any more perfect. You talk to us from the moment you wake, and you smile at delight when we walk into the room. You weigh nearly twenty pounds and I feel it in my arms as I carry you throughout our day. You’re crawling now, an accomplishment you made just shy of the official seventh-month mark. (if you want to see a video…find me (@cakestand) on Instagram!) We’ve yet to baby-proof our house, but it’s happening…this weekend. Standing is your new favorite activity, and you’ll gladly reach for our hands or a table or the side of your crib for support. 

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You still want to breastfeed all the time, and I’m happy to do it. We breastfeed at night. We breastfeed at the coffee shop. We breastfeed on our couch, on our bed, on our kitchen floor. You like broccoli and apples (maybe tolerate is the better word), and I have a feeling we’ll keep breastfeeding for quite a while more.

There’s so much more I could say about you. But know this, love and light and laughter are the words that come to my mind when I think about you.

7months

Monet

Anecdotes and Apple Cores

35 thoughts on “7 months of Lucille Amelia (and 4/52)

  1. TheKitchenLioness

    Dear Monet, what a touching post – tearing at my heartstrings again. You have an amazing writing style, dear friend, so true, so honest and (if I may say so), so full of wisdom.
    And, of course, the pictures of lovely Lucy are like an icing on the cake!
    Love and hugs and kisses from afar!

  2. Marta @ What should I eat for breakfast today

    Oh, I shouldn’t read it in cafe. I am sitting in a place full of people with a positive music and I am crying! Thank you so much, people think I am crazy now, hahaha. Beautiful post. I think that only a mother may have feelings like this one. You’re a lucky gal that you have Lucy.

  3. Christin@SpicySouthernKitchen

    Beautiful post Monet! I love the expression in Lucy’s face in the last picture. Children bring so much joy but there is also so much fear and anxiety that goes along with being a parent. One of my worst fears came true in November when my son was diagnosed with cancer. (He is doing really well :) )
    It has helped me so much to just appreciate each day as it comes and keep my mind very much in the present moment. It also helps to keep my mind really focused. Driving in the car is the worst because my mind always tends to wander.

  4. Nancy @ gottagetbaked

    Monet, I’m sorry to hear you’re in a melancholy mood right now! But you’re absolutely right – your beautiful daughter and loving husband are two shining beacons of light that’ll cut through any darkness. I can’t even imagine the fears that you have running through your head when it comes to Lucy but I have no doubt that your love, support, intelligence and guidance will take her down the right path. Sending much love to you today!

  5. Gina

    Lucy is such a bright spot. You can tell be that inquisitive face she is ready to take on the world already. Days go so fast and the longer you can hold on to her babyhood the better. It’s true there is sunshine where there is darkness, you just have to walk towards it. Wishing you guys a wonderful week.
    -Gina-

  6. Becky

    Monet,
    Lucy certainly is a “bringer of light” to me, and everyone that sees her pictures. I’m enjoying every picture that I see. She is such a special baby, and your words shine through, as you describe her. Happy 7 Month Birthday, Lucy!

  7. Winnie

    She is just beautiful and it makes my day better whenever I see her photo on facebook. Love to you and your sweet family, Monet.

  8. laurasmess

    Monet, this is beautiful. You made me stop, think and digest every word rather than skimming through like I do for some posts. Lucy is gorgeous… healthy, happy, secure and loved. I can definitely understand the feeling of being overwhelmed with the world though. It happens to me often, as this world can be a very dark place at times. I can imagine that the melanchoic feelings would be even further accentuated when you have a little life that you are completely responsible for. However, from what I can see, you and your hubby are doing an incredible job. She’s the picture of happiness and light. Thanks for sharing these thoughts with us. I’ll be praying for safety, health and happiness for you three as this year continues. You’re beautiful inside and out xx

  9. Eileen

    Seeing pictures of happy little Lucy always brings a smile to my face. I can only imagine what a true joy she is to the two of you. Happy weekend!

  10. Chris @ The Café Sucré Farine

    You’re so right Monet, faith, family and friends will get you though any tough times ahead and we just have to take it step by step. And faith is the most important. My kids are grown but I can’t tell you how many times I was on my knees as they grew up, not having a clue as to how to proceed. My prayers for wisdom were always answered though not always in the way that I thought. Having someone much bigger than you is worth more than anything. She is such a little honey, love seeing her grow!

  11. Pam

    Oh my gosh! What a doll baby you are Lucy!!! She is adorable, Monet and so very precious. I love all the pics, esp. the one on the couch. What a joy she is for her family!

  12. John@Kitchen Riffs

    Beautiful daughter. And beautiful post! There’s a lot of fear and uncertainty in the world, and there are always difficulties. But you also have the opportunity to take a picture of Lucy every week! You already know how to deal with life and make your own happiness; that ability won’t desert you in the future, come what may.

  13. Jenny @ BAKE

    They are such beautiful ways to describe your daughter! and such wise words too. I hope you’re feeling a bit happier now and a little less overwhelmed x

  14. Jessie

    What a gorgeous, gorgeous post! Your writing is always so beautiful, Monet. And these adorable pictures of Lucy are just so precious. It must be so hard to remember these lovely moments at times. I’m glad you have your little girl to light up those darker days *hugs*

  15. Otto Hoffman

    my seven month old is still nursing at night to some it may seem odd but breastmilk is not as heavy as formula so yes nurse as much as u like. my son comes to bed with me two to three hours before it is time to get up and i think he nurses about six times before we get up for the day. so yes your doc was wrong and silly try to find a doc that has kids and really knows what they are talking about.

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